No Thanks

No Thanks

December 28, 2015

Dear Friends and Family,

Thank you very much for NOT giving me any of the following gifts:

1.) The robotic companion cat is advertised as looking and feeling life-like. It has built-in sensors that respond to touch, causing the cat to move and to make a realistic purr. It will feel like a real cat when you pat it and is therefore supposed to be very relaxing. These cats are marketed especially as companions for the elderly and  will be so effective you won’t have to worry about not visiting your loved one.

2.) Bullet-proof backpack  All I have to say is that if we have come to the need for this, I have nothing more to say! But if you decided not to get me one, I hope you considered the $600 model.

3) DIY Netflix Socks These socks are designed to wake you up if you nod off when watching a movie at home. If you are wondering about the DIY part, you must assemble them yourself, and the schemata looks like a final in an engineering course. If you want to wash them, you have to take them apart and start all over again.

4.) Motorized hover board  It’s like a mini-Segway and the person riding one looks wicked cool – that is until the board bursts into flame. Since I have difficulty maintaining balance on a flat surface even when not moving, you probably didn’t opt for this gift, but if you did, be advised it’s been recalled.

Again, thank you for your thoughtfulness and have a Happy New Year.

Dorothy C. Judd  (c) 2015

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About twofelines

What to say? I love my family and friends. I also love kids, cats, and books. Oh, and potato chips and Cheez-its. I am a retired teacher who still loves to be in the classroom, so now I am a substitute teacher.
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2 Responses to No Thanks

  1. Ann says:

    OMG! Too funny.

  2. efmcmahon says:

    You captured my sentiments! The past decade I’ve encouraged the gift of an experience as a giver and receiver. The gift
    may cost something or nothing. “Please! I love you just the way you are. No more stuff or gadgets for me.”

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